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Saturday, May 25, 2024

Working hard to make a difference

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    Soothe us with sweet lies. Our love isn’t any different from yours, except it’s hotter, because I’m involved. Why would I want to know that? Actually, that’s still true. We can’t compete with Mom! Her company is big and evil! Ours is small and neutral! Stop it, stop it. It’s fine. I will ‘destroy’ you!

    Is today’s hectic lifestyle making you tense and impatient? OK, if everyone’s finished being stupid. Kif, I have mated with a woman. Inform the men. I am Singing Wind, Chief of the Martians. Good man. Nixon’s pro-war and pro-family. Oh, you’re a dollar naughtier than most.

    I decline the title of Iron Cook and accept the lesser title of Zinc Saucier, which I just made up. Uhh… also, comes with double prize money. Are you crazy? I can’t swallow that. Bender, hurry! This fuel’s expensive! [pause] Also, we’re dying! Wow, you got that off the Internet? In my day, the Internet was only used to download pornography. Ah, the ‘Breakfast Club’ soundtrack! I can’t wait til I’m old enough to feel ways about stuff!

    Incidentally, you have a dime up your nose. Yeah, I do that with my stupidness. All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that’s why I’m transferring

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